If Howard Is An Old Dog, Rudd Gets A Donkey Vote
Sydney Morning Herald
Saturday September 15, 2007
IT IS a question that was briefly popular at job interviews in the think-outside-the-square corporate environment of the 1980s: If you were an animal, which animal would you be?
The aim was to winkle out information about the person's self-image; it worked, until everybody read the cheat sheets and realised that "lion" or "owl" was the correct answer.In a similar spirit, the Herald plied swinging voters from the marginal seats of Parramatta and Lindsay with modest snacks and non-alcoholic drinks, and asked: What would John Howard and Kevin Rudd be, if they resurfaced as animals? Dog themes were immediately apparent. "Howard is a Saint Bernard dog - he's very nice and trustworthy," Laverne, an older voter from Parramatta, said. Dawn agreed: "A devoted, loyal person. Not a Rottweiler; a nice dog." Julie, from Lindsay, saw Howard as a completely different hound: "An old puppy dog; getting older and running into things." Young family folk from Parramatta saw the Opposition Leader as a much younger animal with a bit to learn. "He's like a labrador puppy; does things that are a bit stupid, doesn't mind, runs back," said Simon, a personal trainer with two children. Christie, a mother-of-three, saw Rudd as "like a little otter that pops up and says stuff, then ducks down again". Gary, a father-of-three from Lindsay, thought the Labor leader was "a lion cub, maybe. Inexperienced, finding his way in the world. Potential to become king of the jungle."Less flatteringly, Miranda thought he was "like the donkey off Shrek".The older voters of Parramatta saw Rudd as a cat. "A pussy," hooted Lily, a grandmother, while Dawn drew feline comparisons because, as she put it, "he doesn't seem to have that same loyalty; he likes you when he wants you to like him". But the most popular answer for Rudd was "fox". "Sneaky, sly and in waiting to pounce for his own good," said Richard, a grandfather from Parramatta who had Howard as an elephant."I had Howard as a rabbit and Rudd as a ferret," offered Albert."Ferrets go after rabbits, and Howard is hiding in his hole."Patricia, a mother-of-two from Lindsay, puzzled over the question and made the Prime Minister first a tiger, then a snake."Rudd is a panda," she said."He just seems gentle and caring ... actually, I am seeing a soft toy panda. Not a real one." The Prime Minister reminded several respondents of a hyena. Slightly more cheeringly, several thought he might be a monkey.One thought he was a shark - "top of the food chain and pretty much above reproach".But the worst news came from Albert, of Parramatta: "They're both snakes in the grass."
© 2007 Sydney Morning Herald